Today I got my comments back from the Genesis contest. I entered in two categories, so I had six attachments to review. I gave them all a glance over, then read them again, but both times were brief. I’m not quite ready for that.
I’m of mixed emotions right now. I mean, I’m not surprised that I didn’t final (really…I’m not). But I am surprised at how different my scores were. On a scale of 1-5 (bad-good) I got a 1 from one judge and a 4 from the other. How can something be so wretched to one person while considered well done by another? How do I know what to work on, when one person tells me my dialogue is smooth and natural and the next tells me it’s chit-chatty, but doesn’t tell me if that’s good or bad, or how to fix it?
I really wanna throw a pity party, but I’m pretty much over that part of my life (I threw pity parties for years…they don’t really accomplish much, so I gave up on them). The problem is that I don’t know what to do instead of them. I’m really not sure how to funnel my emotions…I’m not even sure which emotions I’m feeling.
Why is it that the comments that stick in our heads are the worst ones? I really want to focus on the positive…why is it that it’s easier to remember the negative ones?
I’m not really sure how I feel about this right now. I want to be a better writer. I want to do my best. I KNOW that I need honest critiques, good and bad, to do that. It doesn’t make it any easier though, does it?
I wasn’t really sure if I wanted to post this today because I don’t want people thinking that I’m digging for compliments or encouragements. But if this blog is really going to be about me and my attempts to publish a novel, then I should probably talk about my first contest experience.
I think I’ll work on my article now. No characters. No plots. Just the mindless retelling of one townships struggle against accessory buildings.